Home | The Athenry Journal (1995–2004) | Magazine | Chronicle | Education, People, Religion

Info

If the priest preaches over ten minutes, he’s too long-winded.

If his sermon is short, he’s too easy-going.

If the parish funds are low, he is a bad manager:

If he mentions money, he’s too grasping.

If he visits his parishioners, he s nosey.

If he doesn’t, he is snobbish.

If he has festivals and carnivals, he’s bleeding the people.

If he doesn’t, the parish is lacking social life.

If he takes time in Confession, he’s too slow.

If he doesn’t, he is not a good confessor

If he starts Mass on the minute, his watch is fast.

If he is a bit late, he’s holding up the congregation.

If he redecorates the Church, he’s spending too much money.

If he doesn’t, he’s letting the place run down.

If he’s too young, he’s not experienced.

If he is old, he should retire.

If he dies, there will never be his equal again!

– –

Written by Anonymous

Published here 02 Nov 2022 and originally published 1996

– –